That GH Girl’s Guide: Finding a Man in Ghana (Pt2)

*continuing where we left off with part 1*

STEP FIVE: Go to the right locations

You have bought a $1200+ ticket, spent money on hair, nails, clothes, shoes and makeup. You can not waste this arsenal on spending your time in the wrong locations. Your mission is to be found by the right man by being in the right places. Here are a few ideas to help you out.

Church– This is one of the best places to find your potential husband. While you are there praying to God to remove any blockades from your life keep one eye open to see who else is fervently praying to God.  You might be his missing rib.

Now you can’t just go to any church when you go to Ghana. Maame you need to go to the church where the movers and shakers go. The churches with the big names. They usually have A/C in their sanctuary. The church where the well to do people are every Sunday (or once a month if we are honest). You have to go to the big big branches like CEM, ICGC, Light House Chapel International that are in areas like North Legon .

Restaurants–  With this one you can’t just go to any restaurant and you can’t go with just anyone. It’s best you go with a credible person that also wants to see you finally dating a proper man.  You should go with a married friend (female) or an auntie. You want the attention to only be on you. You have to give off signals that you are a free agent looking to get in the game. You cant afford men to see you with another pretty single friend and pick them over you. Never. You must stand out. When you are at the restaurant you need to look available but not too available. You have to look friendly and like you are fun to be around. Make sure you are smiling. If you play your cards right dinner/lunch for you and your auntie (or married friend) will be paid for and you will now have a potential husband (it happens don’t ask me how I know-but trust me Maame this one happens). Some places to try are Burger and Relish, Starbites, or Chez Clarisse

*I don’t think you should go to nightclubs. We need proper lighting so we can see who is approaching and also there will be plenty other women there looking for a man*

Kempinski Hotel- I have put down a specific hotel.I am not saying go to all the hotels. In West Africa you can’t just frequent hotels you will be looked at like a bad girl, if you know what I mean (two-two). The reason why I am saying this hotel is because it is new and has caused a lot of discussion because of their high prices and the caliber of people that visit the place.  This makes it a quality location to scout for your potential man.  So this is what you have to do for this to work. You can’t just walk around the hotel aimless. You need to go there for lunch and make sure you dress professional but nice. If you can go with your laptop, make it look like you are busy doing work while you are having lunch. Ask a potential for business advice. Many business meetings are held there so you will for sure meet a business man and you can start things from there.

Expensive residential areas– They say in Nigeria women jog on the Lekki-Ikoyi Bridge in hopes of meeting and falling in love with the right person. That is smart. You have to be a sharp babe in Ghana and find the right places to strategically place yourself. Hang out in the expensive residential areas.  My advice is to see a potential and say you are lost and ask for directions. Do this only with eligible men. I don’t condone husband snatching. There are plenty single men in this world some younger than you, some your age and plenty that are old. Look for a single man Maame.

Here are a few of the names of the nice residential areas Trasacco Valley, Airport Residential, Ridge/LaBone, East Legon [ side note: These are in Accra I don’t know other parts of Ghana that well. So forgive me, you will have to research where the rich men stay in Kumasi, Brong Ahafo, Tamale or Cape Coast]

Sporting events– This just makes sense. You are looking for a GH man and they love sporting events so why not go to one and have a variety to pick from. But be careful at one of these events so you don’t end up with those men who are too guy-guy.

Weddings– This is important and one of the reasons you had to make GH friends. Weddings are the best place to meet someone who might also be in the mindset of getting married. A wedding sets the right mood and environment for meeting a potential man and makes for a great story later on.

Events/Festivals– Depending on when you go to Ghana there will probably be an event or festival and this could be a great opportunity to meet someone that enjoys the same music, movies or art like you do. These days  there are variety of  events happening in the country like Asa Baako Music Festival, or Chale Wote Street Art Festival.

Friend’s house– This one will work. Tell your GH friend (preferably married because they want all their friends married) that you are looking and they should introduce you to quality men that are also looking for a wife. Key word here is QUALITY they should not introduce you to their friend Kojo who changes women like pants. That is not your portion. You are looking for reliable and honest Kwabena who is looking to carry drinks with his people to the right girl’s house. Next year we need to be going to your wedding. You too must sew kente and lace.

 

STEP SIX : Stay away from Visa Chasers

Coming from abroad you are a trophy, a big prize. For many years we were told stories of GH men who lived abroad and went home to visit and would meet a woman. They would fall in love get married and he would sponsor the wife to come and live with them abroad. But things would change in their love story. As soon as Adwoa steps foot in Toronto she drastically changes into a vampire and decides to leave Akwasi penniless and brokenhearted.

Well now this is happening to ladies. The men in Ghana have heard that there isn’t that much options abroad for some ladies so they have decided this is their chance to prosper. You must be careful of  these men that I call Visa Chasers. To them you are only an opportunity to come to this so called land of milk and honey, this place where the streets are paved in gold. To these men you are  just a VISA. When they get here and are a bit comfortable they will show you pepper and leave you. You will not be a Visa that is not your portion. We rebuke Visa Chasers. May all Visa Chasers who dare approach you be unable to speak (in Jesus’ name).  We don’t want them anywhere near you. You must avoid them at all costs. When you are at  ICGC  or CEM pray that God will not let a Visa Chaser find you.

You have to be careful because you will stand out in Ghana. Even if you are wearing tattered nika boka’s (bigger shorts), ugly chale wotes (slippers-flip flops) and have your hair in a duku (head wrap),  GH people are still able to some how tell you are from abroad and might even call you Borga (hate that word). Visa Chasers can spot you and sniff you out. They will lock their radar onto you and not let go. Sometimes it can be hard to spot them because they seem so nice and genuine  but that is why you must investigate before you settle on a man. Here are a few signs to help you spot a Visa Chaser:

1. They quickly say they like/love you. A Visa Chaser will probably be quick to tell you that he wants to marry you after just meeting you. You have to be careful of these quick declarations of love. How can he want to marry you after seeing you sitting at Papaye (a fast food joint in Ghana) with your cousin Abrefi enjoying some chicken and fries? He knows nothing about you. You could be sent by Maame Wata to torment him for all he knows.

2. Visa Chasers will always want to talk about where you live. Conversations will be like “I can’t wait to get to Canada. Ghana is so difficult, you are so blessed to like in Canada. Tell me more about Canada. I will come and visit you in Canada I hear it is really nice”. If all they seem to care about is where you live abroad that is a sign you are their ticket out of Ghana.

STEP  SEVEN: Investigate

Now you have gone to a variety of places, dodged Visa Chasers and been introduced to a variety of quality men. So you must have a good amount of numbers and have spent a good amount of time talking to these men getting to know them a little better. This is the point where you must investigate and do your research to pick the right person(s). You have to pick the man who will call you long distance when you go back home and not have a problem using their MTN, Airtel, TIGO, or Vodafone credits on you.

Since you are looking wonderful with your lashes, fake hair and new clothes men will flock to you. Men who are not single will join that queue and try their luck. So you must ask plenty questions. You can not just trust that a man who approaches you is single. He might want to add you to his collection of women. He might be looking for “associates” to help his wife.  So keep your eyes open. Check when they contact you. Is it only at certain times during the day/night? Do they make excuses for not being able to go out at a certain times? You have to be wise. You must become a CIA agent in this situation and search for all the information/facts you need.

While investigating and picking the right man I would suggest that you don’t let them touch your “something”. Yes I know you have needs. Yes I know you haven’t had someone even wink at you in a long time, so to have these fine African men showing you all this attention you can’t handle it. Maame handle yourself and those feelings.  If you start doing “the thing” you wont be able to pick correctly. If you don’t take care one of your potential men will works you paa that you won’t notice or care that he has a girlfriend that lives in Tafo.  Have a clear mind to pick carefully.

Reason being you will head back home and start a long distance relationship with the person you pick. This means you wont be able to see them and what they are up to (likewise they wont be able to do the same with you) so you have to pick correctly so you can sleep well at night knowing Yaw is being faithful.

*If you don’t like my advice about not letting them see your thing, please be safe and always use protection*

Overall these steps are just guidelines to help you out in your search for happily ever after. If you do decide to search in Ghana be safe, be careful and have fun. If you do find someone using these steps, message me so I can prepare my ntoma for your traditional wedding. I will be expecting my invite.

 

 

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